‘This is NOT normal’: 24-year-old married woman removes parental tracking from her phone after parents judge her comings and goings, they unjustifiably retaliate

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  • "AITA for removing all phone tracking from my parents who keep using it to see my location for non emergencies?"

    Here's the situation. I (24f) am married and live in a different state than my parents. I've had iPhones "find my friends" app since I had a phone at 12 years
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  • old that my parents set up. When I got married, my husband found it strange that my parents could see my location once we moved out but I just figured they would want it on for safety.
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  • Come two years later... my brother (21) who still lives with my parents gives me a heads up that my parents were judging my
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  • actions based on my location. I figured it would be a good time to remove that app anyways and thus, deleted their ability to see my location.
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  • This blew up into a whole situation where my parents are now saying that it was providing them comfort and safety to know where I was and it was just a
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  • 'mishap' and bad day for them. Additionally, my dad decided to retaliate and remove my access from all streaming services he paid for and threatened to remove my brother from the wifi for tattling as well.
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  • AITA for removing them from seeing my location? My husband has never heard of parents seeing their kids location once they've moved out but my parents seem to think it's the end of the world. Just wanted to get other people's thoughts. Thanks!
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  • EDIT: Thank you all for the advice and thoughts! I originally posted as I've heard of other families sharing location as adults so I felt like the odd one out for not wanting this however you guys have helped me realize this is NOT normal.
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  • Additionally I want to make mention that I am completely fine paying for my own streaming services (and already pay for the ones that don't allow sharing on
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  • my own.) This is the ONLY thing my parents had been providing financially. I brought it up as a point of their reaction to help provide context of the situation.
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  • BanterPhobic NTA. Even when you were under the impression that the tracking feature would only be used for strictly safety-related reasons, you had every right to stop using it because you're an adult with a right to make your own choices.
  • Once it became clear that your parents were using the app to just kind of judge your life, any remaining reason you may have had to keep it switched on went out of the window. Keep it as it is and don't look back.
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  • owls_and_cardinals NTA. You are an adult and your parents are using this information inappropriately. This is a perfect natural consequence for them to face. If you get retaliatory responses, well that s ks but again - see 'you're an adult'. Start paying for your own services.
  • If your parents are going to be this transactional and demand inappropriate access to you by holding things like paying for streaming services over your head, it's pretty unhealthy, but it's their prerogative and you should be independent in this way by now anyway, seeing that you are married and live independently.
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  • SliceEquivalent825 NTA This has control freak written all over it. That they got mad and retaliated, proves that they are angry at you for taking their control away. You did the right thing. You have a good brother.
  • Ok-Position7403 NTA and your father's retaliations prove that it's not just a safety/comfort thing for them but a control thing.
  • LolaSupreme19 NTA. Removing the "find my friends" App was a Declaration of Independence. As an adult, married, woman there isn't any need for your parents to track you. That they reacted so negatively to you removing the App says a lot about what they think and their disrespect of you. Stick to your decision. They will eventually get the message that you run your own life.

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